Lemme scoot over and make some room for you on the toilet.
The other day some asshole rattled the door so long and hard, as I was repeatedly shouting occupied, that the lock jiggled open and I had to hold the door shut with my foot. Then the guy shouts “What the fuck?!” and storms out of the restroom.
What the fuck, indeed, buddy. What the fuck, indeed.
He didn’t want you to leave, he wanted to join you
When they knock, just say “Come in.”
“the party’s just starting!”
One time, not only did the person try the door, I yell “OCCUPIED”… then pounded on the door, then tried the handle again… somehow immediately got the attention of an employee who just fucking unlocked the door. And I’m just standing there, dick in hand like “WHAT THE FUCK”… and they were like, “oh sorry, we didn’t think anyone was in here”. Couldn’t wait one god damn minute, cause I had just walked in.
This is the “just letting you know that someone is waiting” signal. I only do it when they’re taking fucking forever.
Hey, sometimes it takes a bit to find the right vid. If you need to poop so bad, go poop in the sink.
rattle rattle
“Uh! Wh-who is it?!”
RATTLE RATTLE
“Uh … occupied!”
BAM BAM BAM “UUARRRRRGH! UUARRRRRGH!”
“I, uh … j-just you wait until I-”
BANG BANG BANG! "UUARRGLE! UUARRGLE!
“Right, you! What’s your-”
Bathroom is empty.
Every workplace ever. Coupled with comment about always taken toilet (I swear to god some people forget they have to go until they see someone head in the toilets general direction)
Just fart harder!! Show dominance through unaffected pooping.
Be a kind neighbor, unleash a gutteral animalistic screech to help loosen their bowels and shorten their visit.
This happens so much, I’m convinced that some of them want to see someone in the middle of whatever…
This is why they put those big gaps between the door, so you can put your eye up to it like a peephole to be sure it’s occupied. If it is, I’ll usually just drop a friendly, “I like your style!” and keep waiting my turn.
