• RBWells@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Sexy time? No thanks

    Movie? No thanks

    What do you want to do?

    Sit on the porch with you, have a drink and talk, go for a walk, sleep, whatever.

    Why not just ask? Or:

    I’m gonna watch Hot Fuzz, do you want to?

    OMG you are so hot I want you right now.

    Not that it’s someone’s responsibility to know how to ask things, but I think it does help to you know, know your partner. Someone asking “sexy time?” wouldn’t make me want sex, and I might want to watch a movie if I know which one.

    Even better - "I’m gonna play Genshin, unless you wanna watch a movie, is there anything you want to watch? "

    Like, there are probably a thousand better ways to approach this. Maybe it’s in the delivery not the suggestions.

    • BrickEater@lemmy.world
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      16 hours ago

      Guess I’m lucky, my gf and I look at each other and just ask “wanna touch?” And 9/10 times touchy time commences. Literally zero bullshit nuance or mind reading. We have great communication and neither of us dance around what we want. Best relationship I’ve had.

      • RBWells@lemmy.world
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        11 hours ago

        We love sex and do it everyday, and generally do compromise up (if either of us want to we do) but I so love me some nuance, too. Often, approach does matter and it’s nice. “wanna fuck” because I am bored is less likely to land than if I approach my husband physically, I know this. He knows me too, and how to get me started.

        Again - I don’t think it’s necessarily a requirement, just good to know how to ask, and to be aware of how your partner is feeling at the moment. Likely better results if you care to.