Honey Bunches of Hos

Cocoa Fluffers

Make Me Nut Cheerios

Fucky Charms

Honey-Cum

Apple Jackoffs

Frosted Mini-Teats

Root Loops

Kox

Peanut Butt Munch

Grape Nuts

Kellogg’s Frosted Face.

Fruit loops.

I’ll see myself out.

Nookie Crisp

Well, well, well, if it isn’t Count Cockula.

Raisin’ nuts bran

At the end of every week each one of us becomes a freak

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And then you head down the aisle and experience the immense disappointment of encountering shelves and shelves of rebranded horse feed.

Weedabix

Cheeri-hoes