Midnight Wolf

sitting at a stoplight, wanting a new car

this is what we call a pro-gamer move

throws it into reverse and slams the accelerator

No… I guess it was too fast, too furious

crickets

🥁

I’ll be here all week

“bet it all on green”

“sir this is horse betting”

“GREEN”

(X) Doubt

(I’m beyond that age but the reference is better than saying ‘ha, incorrect’)

Can confirm

Are we supposed to combine them, or…?

This is the artistic vision of the gta3 school bus that you see in wrecking yards, that got reduced to just a rusty version instead (and no drivable version) because it was acceptable at the time to shoot people’s limbs off and have blood shoot out as they collapsed and died, or to fuck a hooker for extra health and then run her over to retrieve the money you just paid, but violence with children? Slow down there buddy, let’s ease into this kinda stuff with some hot coffee first.

Money. Not gift cards, not ‘you’ll take me out for a fancy lunch’, not ‘I’ll buy you something off your Amazon wishlist’. Money. Cold, physical currency.

Why? Parents and relatives are denser than a concrete bomb shelter. I don’t want furniture, I don’t want games, I don’t want gift certificates. If I want something, I’ll buy it myself. And for my ‘splurge’ list, you know what, sure mom. I want an XL David from Bad Dragon, in natural colors, and in a soft+medium firmness. And, because I want to feel like I am being spitroasted, a small Flint, in natural, and soft. I do need to work on my gag reflex. Oh, you’ll just give me cash? Okay then. Don’t open any package addressed to me, mmkay?

I do love literal wording like this. Cheesecake also comes to mind, just slap some Monterey Jack onto my birthday cake, thanks.

Not my particular kink, but as long as you are having fun 😳

🐺

No, money down!

You are a cat, and the games are laser pointers.

“wtf why does he want to buy a ram?” 🐏

Oh hey Bob, Bob.

“ah, that’s a bother. I’ll try one of my American Express cards instead, or perhaps my Schwab card.”

Gotta start with the mediocre card first, so you can spin the situation in your favor.

No no, that’s Jesus, he is a drug mule for the cartel. He drives a Chevy Suburban. Great for moving bricks of cocaine.

If you insist…

There was a guy in my Advanced Marketing class, 11th grade, who sat behind me (back corner), didn’t do shit the entire semester (the rest of us weren’t much better, but at least we faked it). One day he comes in and his backpack is full, visibly. Odd. Like 20 minutes into class, he taps my shoulder, so I turn around. He unzips the bag, and it’s literally full of weed, bagged up. I’m like holy shit, and he says he has someone who wants it. Tells the teacher that he’s going to the bathroom, which knows he’s up to some shit and says no. Guy gets up and leaves anyway.

About 15 minutes later, guy comes back in. I turn around as he sits down, he opens the bag for me to look. Gone. All of it. This was like bigger combined volume than a dictionary. He has this smirk, and I’m just surprised; like I knew a few people who smoked, but that is an absolutely insane amount. Teacher never did anything for them leaving, which we all expected, since he was half-assing his bit, too. I should have asked him how much he made. And where the fuck he got it from initially - he’s wasn’t the type I’d expect to grow his own, the definition of brawn over brains.

I think he ‘passed’ with a D. But he was evidently very good at marketing and distribution.

Texting from a landlines: star 4 6 2 4 7 pound pound pound pound 7 9