Gives you consciousness, love and the power to deeply connect and bond with your loved ones.

Also

you’re all mortal, have fun missing the fuck out of each other when the random clock strikes “YA DEAD”.

Just googled to see if I was misremembering because I definitely browsed the regular web on my Nokia N73. It also came out in 2006, and back in the day it was not called a smartphone.

I would say your statement is factually incorrect.